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WIP Ship's Log Entries by Lord K - M - Kancolle

Discussion in 'Anime, Cartoons, and Comics' started by Callagan, May 4, 2018.

  1. Callagan

    Callagan Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2012
    Messages:
    123
    Title: Ship's Log Entries
    Author: Lord K
    Rating: M (No official rating, but has graphic depictions of violence)
    Fandoms: Kantai Collection
    Genre: Action / Drama
    Words: 63k
    Status: WIP
    Summary: A Canadian wakes up as a ship girl for a ship that was never built. Stranded alone, with no information or contact with anyone, CVB-44 has to rely on her wits and ingenuity to survive.
    Links:
    Chapters 1-3
    - https://forums.spacebattles.com/thr...-idea-and-recs.332794/page-1043#post-32196592
    Chapter 4 - https://forums.spacebattles.com/thr...-idea-and-recs.332794/page-1046#post-32336578
    Chapter 5 - https://forums.spacebattles.com/thr...-idea-and-recs.332794/page-1051#post-32638654
    Epilogue Part 1 - https://forums.spacebattles.com/thr...-idea-and-recs.332794/page-1120#post-35484898
    Epilogue Part 2.1 - https://forums.spacebattles.com/thr...-idea-and-recs.332794/page-1267#post-42138934

    Yes, it's a Kancolle SI fic. Not sure there's an audience for that here, but it's worth a shot.

    The Good:
    • CVB-44 is the best SI I've ever read, with a strong character voice and a believable character arc.
    • Her struggle to survive is thrilling (from chapter 2 onwards at least).
    • When she finally starts to interact with canon characters, it's in a way that doesn't make me want to punch the author in the face.
    The Bad:
    • Mostly "tell" instead of "show".
    • Lots of exposition and navywank, especially in chapter 1 and any scene from another PoV.
    • Speaking of scenes from another PoV, most are really bad, alternating between exposition/navywank and MC wank. The epilogue is better about this, but only in scenes that have CVB-44 in an active role.
    • Weak prose whenever it shows up.
    • Requires some knowledge of WW2 and Kancolle. The WW2 stuff can be easily googled if you care, but the Kancolle stuff is harder to figure out if you don't already have some knowledge of the base material.
    • May be dead, since the author had their notes destroyed between epilogues part 1 and 2.
    The Ugly:
    • You probably noticed there are five links. That's because the story never got its own thread on Spacebattles. Instead, it's buried in multiple pieces in the Kancolle snippets thread. Most annoyingly, none of the posts prior to the epilogue have backlinks or links to the next chapter. To top it off, all of the story pieces are stuck in spoiler tags.
    Overall, I give it a 4/5. It's an enjoyable read if you can look past the flaws (and the fact that it's a Kancolle SI fic), but even its best parts aren't masterpiece material.
     
  2. Zombie

    Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    6,036
    Isn't this entire fandom about the personalities being... actual ships?
     
  3. Callagan

    Callagan Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2012
    Messages:
    123
    Yes. To be fair, the ship he SI'd into isn't made from scratch. It was planned to be built, but never got actually built before the war ended. The actual canon has done this multiple times in order to pad its list of ships, so I don't consider it a big deal. The story does, though, so that's why I put it in the summary.
     
  4. oakes

    oakes Unspeakable DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2011
    Messages:
    730
    Location:
    Turkey
    So they’re ships? Actual ships? Not an acronym for relation”ship” or something.

    Are they like androids that can shapeshift into ships? Like transformers?
     
  5. Zombie

    Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2007
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    6,036
    No, they're actual ships. With personalities.
     
  6. Callagan

    Callagan Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2012
    Messages:
    123
    They're girls with tiny model ship guns who skate across the water. Each girl is loosely based on a World War 2 naval vessel. Whether they're made of metal or not, along with many other things, is unclear in canon, because canon is kind of shit and doesn't explain anything ever.
     
  7. Zombie

    Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2007
    Messages:
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    So I gave this one a chance, because if I'm going to read about ship girls I'd rather start off with someone's recommendation than something I've found on my own.

    There seems to be very few good things about this. I think its easy to get into because it is an SI fic and so I can read it as its own unique story line as compared to having followed the canon universe to any extent. It didn't live up to any expectation so I wasn't disappointed when it petered off at the last couple of updates.

    Like was already stated, strong character voice, and the struggle to survive are about the only things going for this, otherwise its as interchangeable as any other SB idea that winds up in those threads. It seems to mesh with the hivemind mentality they've got established there for the worse.

    3/5

    Anyone else got any thoughts on this? I've always been curious to see how extensive the following of Shipgirls are on DLP. I see them meme'd about all the time, but that's about it.