Fuck Sansa and her shitty ending.
Fuck Bran and his fucking wheels, hope Drogon comes back and torches him.
Fuck Grey Worm, I hope they all drown on those ships.
Daenerys' death was pathetic; not even one final word?
Fuck separating all the Starks for the ending. "The pack survives" my ass.
Why are the wildlings not settling in the goddamn Neck instead of going into more inhospitable North?
As a matter of fact, why couldn't Jon just chill in Winterfell with Queen Red Cunt? Unsullied sailed away, who's going to fucking object?
Fuck Bron being rewarded instead of getting a sword to the neck.
And fuck Arya's entire fucking story line in the last 4 seasons of the show.

Only part of the episode I enjoyed was Brienne's scene and the lords laughing at democracy.
I hope DnD never make anything again, but knowing my luck they'll probably make an adaptation of Silmarilion after their Star Wars gig.

Edit: I didn't like this episode.

 

Chaos is a ladder ramp.

 

I read all spoilers and even with them this episode managed to make me question the writers.

Honestly, they should agree to Sam's proposition. It makes as much sense in this setting as choosing Bran. And what about these Varys' letters? Nothing, I suppose.

There is simply no way that Sansa can become the Queen of the North and the rest of the Kingdoms stay united. At very least not Dorne which was independent a lot longer than the North, if that's what it takes.

Dany's fate is going to anger a lot of people, but after the last episode, it could end only like this. And if they did better job with getting there, it could really work, but it doesn't when considering the rest of the series. While Tyrion's speech explains what they were aiming for, I would say they missed. Others may disagree.

Arya's going west didn't feel earned when it could if they managed to set it up properly. As it was, I suspect she's simply going to travel around, not decide to become a sailor trying to discover "America".

Jon going to the far North is a nice ending for him though. Maybe in the books he's going to stay with Val there.

Tyrion becoming the Hand works too. I'm not sure about his Council because none of the other Kingdoms are represented yet when they should.

Liked Brienne and Podric's fates, even if Brienne should be North with Sansa. Maybe she borrowed her to Bran?

Overall, while not completely terrible and with some good parts, the ending, and the whole season, didn't work as well as it could with the rest of the series. Everything else, from acting to production, was a top quality and people who made the series should be congratulated for at least that.

 

Hahahha I thought I'd hate King Bran, but it's actually so good. Why? Because Bloodraven/Bran played everyone so well and won the game of thrones. He planned everything from the start. Turned down the lordship of the North because he knew he was meant for better things. Told Jon his heritage so he'd fuck up things with Dany, flaming her psychosis, leading eventually to Bran's own ascension. Bran had that long conversation with Tyrion to, unbeknownst to Tyrion, convince him he'd be a great fit for king. Even better, Bloodraven's already like 125 years old, probably not gonna die soon, and who knows how long Bloodraven!Bran will live. Why even have the idea of an election for the throne when Bran will live forever :')

Bran is too good.

 

I expected nothing and I was still let down.

 

Bran won the game of thrones. I’m ok with this...at least until my Vader!Joffrey takes the seat. Maybe.

 

Sorry, but in the tv show, the three-eyed Raven is not Brynden Rivers. They are different characters, so yeah .

 

For me, it's that realization that all those shitty spoilers from like a year ago are what actually happened. Like... fuck. This is supposed to be GRRM's magnum opus. It's not really the end results that actually bother me, it's the actual storytelling that was extremely lacking.

 

Holy shit. Okay, off the top of my head:

Spoiler

1. Where did that unbelievably enormous, suspiciously fascist looking Targaryen banner come from? Were they just carrying that around?

2. I really enjoyed how that whole dramatic scene with Arya and the horse came to absolutely nothing. Also her whole revenge/I am become Death arc in general. That random comment from seasons ago about what's west-of-west, that' what really needed paying off. Foreshadowing is the same as character development right?

3. Also Varys sending off the notes about Jon, dramatically taking off the rings, all that. It amounted to...nothing? Because even the appearance of complex politicking is no longer a thing.

4. Why exactly did Sansa become/stay an avowed separatist, given that the North showed up to overthrow the government(?) in King's Landing? Is there any reason to suspect it will actually make the North safer? Or that it won't be a bone of contention for years to come? Or that they just won't end up married into the other kingdoms eventually anyway?

5. Why did Sam have a vote at the council thing? Were the Tarlys one of the Lords Paramount? Can he be Lord Tarly and the Arch Maester at the same time? And I know he's good guy, but was he really best qualified for the position?

6. After dropping that line about Bran looking for Drogon, did they really not bother with a scene of him flying over Valyria? Of course not, that might have been mildly cathartic on some level.

7. Bran. My mother actually correctly guessed Bran would become king, because she regularly falls asleep mid-episode and so just made a random guess when asked. Again, great conclusion to his whole becoming-distant-from-humanity thing. Like, objectively he's probably not a terrible choice, it's just not a very narratively satisfying ending.

8. All those dothraki didn't, like, rape and plunder their way across King's Landing at any point huh? They just left peacefully.

9. The thing with Edmure was the best part of the episode.

10. Did they really have to spend so much time being melancholy about the deaths of Cersei and Jaime? That scene was tepid, not tragic. I'm not saying it would have been impossible to make the twins dying together sad or meaningful, but they sure didn't manage it.

I can't believe how bad the finale was. Not just bad, but boring. They had this whole season on rails going somewhere, I was expecting at least good showpieces and shallow catharsis once we got there. Instead it was a big fart. Peter Dinklage and Emilia Clarke got more time to blow hot air and prove their acting chops I guess. Just, wtf?

 

Honestly, that might be worst offense. Like I actually struggled to finish it.

 

Honestly, I'm just surprised how accurate those leaks were about this episode. I was expecting something, anything, to be at least a little bit different. But nope, I might as well have gotten the original script.

Spoiler

1. Grey Worm: Lannister prisoners, I'm personally going to execute you now. I know Dany already burned the city to the ground and killing half a dozen prisoners seems no biggy compared to that, but hey, we want to make it really clear how bad this all is.

Jon: No, don't do it! Those soldiers immediately switched to Cersei's side after she destroyed the Great Sept of Baelor. Logically, those men should want to join Dany now that she destroyed an entire city.

Grey Worm: Jon, Cersei's men can all respawn after every single battle without any explanation where the extra men came from. By Dany's commands, only her forces are allowed to do that now.

2. Tyrion: I don't know why I'm wandering around the Red Keep. I fully expected my siblings to have escaped, and you would think the underground passages would have been completely caved in. Seven Hells, considering the fact an entire castle fell in that area, they would have been buried under a ton of rubble.

*Tyrion easily gets in the underground passages, and finds Cersei and Jaime under a couple rocks.

Tyrion: Wow, they look great for being buried under a freaking castle. Er, I mean NNNNOOOO, not Jaime and Cersei! I know Cersei was a monster who wanted me dead all my life and the feeling was kind of mutual, but this really upsets me.

3. Dany: So, I don't suppose I can convince anyone one of those theories about what happened with burning down the city were actually true? Drogon did it on his own initiative, Bran warged into me or the dragon, Littlefinger was alive and using a Faceless Men trick to be me this whole time? Nothing? Eh, screw it, I'm just going to be evil now. Even though I'm talking about helping people oppressed with shitty systems like slavery and feudalism, I guess the fact I burned down the city kind of makes that point moot.

Tyrion: You're the third big bad this season gave us. This is just getting ridiculous.

Dany: Oh, and arrest Tyrion. It's officially for quite clearly committing treason by freeing a brother that ended up dying anyway, but really it's because you were a shitty advisor that just made things worse for me.

4. Tyrion: You totally have to stop Dany. She's trying so hard to create a perfect world and kill horrible people who do shitty things, she won't care how many innocent people will die along the way.

Jon: Varys. That's literally Varys you're describing. You know, the guy who spent ages trying to develop his perfect prince and create a world that doesn't sell boys and cut their genitals off, he didn't care how many people died in the wars to come or how many children had their tongues cut off.

Tyrion: Look, just kill her, ok? For some reason she wants to ignore my advice, so now she's totally a monster that must be stopped.

5. Jon: Dany, isn't it kind of weird that it's snowing a lot, when we already killed the Night's King and defeated the White Walkers three episodes ago?

Dany: The show kind of forgot about that one vision of me with the Iron Throne from Season 2, so they had to pay it off now. Jon, I know I look bad with that whole burning King's Landing bit and all, but I swear that was because of some shitty writing. How about we get married, and rule Westeros together?

Jon: No can do, but I will act the hell out of killing you.

Dany: Aw, wait what?

*Jon kills Dany*

Drogon: I'm so mad!!! I know the man responsible is literally right there, but I'm going to take all my rage on the Iron Throne. Compared to the massive monstrosity of a throne the books and artwork describe, you are a glorified chair.

6. Grey Worm: As the only major figure on Dany's side left, I'm keeping Jon prisoner. Why I'm not just executing him or Tyrion is beyond me, but what say you, representatives of all of Westeros?

Davos: Why am I here? I'm not a great lord of anything, shouldn't someone more important like Gendry be up here instead?

Tyrion: People know you better. Since we don't have a universally acknowledged ruler, I propose we just elect a king among ourselves. That system totally failed in both the Holy Roman Empire and the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth, so I'm sure it'll work here no problem.

Edmure: In that case, I'd like to nominate myself.

Sansa: Who are you again?

Edumure: Why, your uncle Edmure Tully of course.

Sansa: ...

Edmure: Lord of Riverrun and the Riverlands? I know I haven't been around for years, but come on. I'm your uncle, and Robin's over there.

Sansa: Oh, now you're just making people up!

Robin: Nope, I'm Robin Arryn, lord of the Eyrie. Although at this point Ser Royce over here probably had more screentime than me.

Tyrion: MOVING ON, I'd like to nominate Bran as King.

Everyone, Literally Everyone: You mean the weird guy that hasn't done anything useful with all his powers, outright admits he doesn't want anything anymore, and seems more interested in the history behind the wheelchair than the Night King about to kill him?

Tyrion: Yep, him. And I'm saying this because of some nonsense about stories or something, and not because he's secretly warging me into nominating him.

Everyone, Literally Everyone: Well, that's still d-

*Bran Stare*

Everyone, Literally Everyone: Hail Bran the Broken!

Grey Worm: But, what about Jon? We still have him prisoner, and I don't want to just release him.

Sansa: Just send him to the Night's Watch.

Grey Worm: Oh, you mean the place right next to Stark forces, where he could easily be freed by you and we'd have no way to stop it? You know what, screw it, I'm taking the Unsullied and Dothraki back to Essos. Don't ask why the Dothraki give a shit what I say.

Sansa: I should probably use this as a chance to keep Jon with me, but I just realized I don't care. And by the way, you're all cool if I keep the North independent, right?

Tyrion: Actually-

*Bran Stare*

Tyrion: Enjoy your independence!

7. Arya: So I'm going to sail to the western edge of the world. I never expressed a desire to do such a thing, but I want to do what no one else has ever done before.

Elissa Farman: Bitch, I did it and reached Asshai over 130 years before you were born!

Brandon the Shipwright: And I am literally your ancestor who famously did that exact thing!

Frodo Baggins: So a protagonist who is emotionally scarred from her experiences fighting and surviving and doesn't really belong home anymore is going to sail to the West with the implications they'll never return? Jee, never heard that one before.

8. Tyrion: Ah, it feels good to be Hand yet again. I haven't actually done anything smart or useful as Hand since the Blackwater, but I'm sure I'll do a good job this time. Now, who are my fellow Small Council members?

Davos: Well, I'm the Master of Ships, which is actually a perfectly qualified position for me.

Brienne: I'm the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard, I think? As the only decent fighter left in the South, that isn't a bad idea.

Bronn: And I'm the Master of Coin, and Lord of Highgarden. Both those things are extremely dumb, and only true because D&D love me too much for their own good. Seven Hells, even Master of Whispers or War would have made more sense than naming a sellsword that might not even be literate Master of Coin.

Samwell: And I'm the Grandmaester!

Tyrion: But, you haven't completed your chain yet. That sort of thing takes years to get, you left the Citadel before you got even one link, and it's kind of ridiculous they gave it to you instead of someone older and more knowledgeable in these things. And are they totally ok with you and Gilly?

Samwell: Eh, I think the show is counting on everyone forgetting she exists. Oh, and check out this cool book, A Song of Ice and Fire! Want to read it?

Tyrion: Nope. If the show isn't going to bother reading it, why should I? Now where's Bran?

Bran: Right here. Not that I'm actually going to do anything, of course. I'll just try to find Drogon or something, and leave running the Kingdoms in your capable hands.

Bronn: We need more brothels!

Tyrion: No wonder Sansa wanted to secede, we are so fucked.

9. Jon: Wait, am I really going to join the Night's Watch? The Wall's destroyed, there's nobody left actually guarding it, the White Walkers are all gone, and we're now friendly with the wildlings. Why am I bothering with this, and not just going back to Winterfell.

Tormund: Want to go Beyond the Wall with us instead?

Jon: Sure, why not. But first, I have to pet Ghost. Happy now, dog lovers?

 

Good points: Edmure. The production. The music. The visuals.

Bad bits: Pretty much everything else. The story arcs. The way Jon killed Dany. Bran not actually being shown to find Drogon. The Small Council.

I really don't know how to reach to this episode. It's just a bunch of... crap.

 

The scene I wish was included:

Spoiler: West of West is just a convoluted way of saying East

Seeing Jon sailing north, Arya moved into the shadows.

From behind her, a familiar voice whispered, "A girl is tarrying."

She stiffened, then turned to face the man she knew as Jaqen H'ghar. "A girl is not."

"And what of Arya Stark?"

"What of her?"

"If a girl does not need to be Arya Stark anymore, a girl should--"

She pulled the mask from her face, then looked at it in her hands. "A girl is done."

"This is good. A man needs a girl to be someone else. The many-faced god has many tasks for those who follow him."

 

Well, if there's one good thing about this, it's that we're going to get a tsunami of "let's fix Season 8" fics now. if even 5% of them are interesting it'll be a win.

 

Rest in peace you, then. They've got a Star Wars trilogy.

 

I thought that one lumberjack was enough for a lifetime. Apparently not.

 

I actually liked this episode so... Fuck Y'all...

 

I liked it. The last three episodes had to cover the entirety of "A dream of spring" and I think it was fucking awesome.

People didn't get what they wanted this season and they'll all be mad. What's worse is that they will have all missed the point of A song of ice and fire in the first place.

 

I don't think most people missed the point; I think most people missed good writing and story telling.

 

I don't think anyone has issues with what happened (mostly), but how it happened. None of it was earned, everything felt rushed.

If that's what you wanted though, grats I guess?





Actually, fuck that. Everything between the Lannister siblings was a straight up hatchet job of the highest order.