To be fair, it explains a lot about why everybody is so insane.

 

Fics which claim "Dark Harry" but are actually HP/V slash

 

That's especially annoying because 90 percent of supposed Dark Harry is slash. Apparently the dark arts turn you gay.

Which also makes me wonder why there aren't any good Harry/Bella fics that feature a Dark Harry.

 

Because being Dark turns you gay, and Bella is not a boy, nor is Harry a girl.

 

Perhaps an association being made between "forbidden" things in the mind of the author? Or at least, one raised in a cultural matrix that discourages homosexuality.

 

So let me see if I understand this, having children at 20(while having a lifespan at least twice of the best muggle countries) is not rushing it? Not entirely sure how that makes sense...

Anyway I think it is more that being powerful turns you gay, just look: Dumbledore, Grindelwald and Voldemort. Two are gay and the other probably sacrificed everything involved for no gain at all.

 

That's your cultural bias. Late Roman Empire, girls married at 12-15 years of age. Same with quite a few Greek cities. Late Roman Empire Christian culture, girls married at 18-19 years of age. On the other end, Middle ages and later England, women were often in their mid-twenties before they married.

My guess is that the roots of marriage ideas in the British magical system are found in late Roman empire/early British empire. As such, marrying at twenty would be normal, and maybe even a tad late, for the woman, that is. Men were often older when they got married. The shift to the same age of marriage partners in the story is an anachronistic device for the reader to be able to relate to the parents.

I think one doesn't have a damn thing to do with the other, except that teenage fanfic writers think it makes them edgy to write the stories.

 

Or maybe yours? The main reason people marry later is because they have other things to do that marriage doesn't fit with. Wizarding World has plenty of that and it has even less problems with doing it later on since they have a lot more time than even us in both doing it safely and in sheer time to spend with whoever they have. Plus Harry does come from our culture so while it may have been largely abandoned/overwritten it is plays a part at least. Especially since he has a best friend which is likely to remain in contact with our culture. It only makes things odder that apparently they both had a carrer so who took care of the children...?

And now that I checked I suppose I was right, the eldest was born at 2002 so Harry was 22 by then which would be still early for us except their education ends at 17 so it is roughly equivalent to a person having children at 27 or so. Plus Ginny did spend several years as professional quidditch player so she did focus on other things first. Yep perfectly fitting even if personally I would have probably waited longer pretty sure I am in the minority in pretty much any country though, biased to consider my personal opinions in this aspect anyway. Harry Potter is ultimately a fairy tale so it is actually a wonder they didn't immediately marry, have children and lived forever after now that I think of it... Pretty pointless writing all this overall.

Also I suppose I should have quoted Hero since it was in followup with his and that would have made it clear that was not serious. At all.

 

Since when was Grindelwald gay?

 

Some discussion in science-y circles suggests that it's a matter of hormone saturation (or lack thereof) whilst percolating in the womb. So, 1882?

 

Fem!Harry/Bellatrix. Go!

 

I think what he meant is this:

Dumbledore was gay and in love with Grindelwald, yes, but we were never told whether Albus' affection was returned.

Gellert might be gay - or not, and only using Albus' feelings for him as a means of manipulation. Heck, he might not even realize what Albus' feelings were in the first place, seeing him only as a friend. A very good friend and an equal in power and intellect, but no romantic feelings.

 

Yes, exactly what Oruma said. Although I did get a chuckle out of wordhammer's response.

 

It's sort of like when some big hotshot famous guy whose gay and has a single male friend who hangs around alot. Like that assistant guy Michelangelo wrote poems about.


So we can't prove Grindelwald is gay, but there is a reasonably high chance that he was. Plus I like the idea from a general plot perspective, it makes the dynamic of the whole history of that war much more interesting.

 

Fics that copypasta from canon. I don't have a problem with fics that take place during canon, like Year of Darkness. But I hate it when, well,

"- I intend to have these stories follow the book, NOT the movie! So much so that I've actually taken it upon myself to write this word for word from the actual book."

Fuck that. That is lazy beyond belief, and feels like eating something, vomiting it out, and eating it again. If it doesn't add anything new, it shouldn't be there. Now, it's a different matter if the same events occur with new information that adds subtext or makes the scene mean something more, or if it's a call back to a canon scene, but I honestly hates this more than-

Wait.
There is something I hate more than this.
That fucking Dr. Horrible fic.

Okay, you don't need to know the canon for this, so the spoiler-wary of you can relax. The fic was a Dr. Horrible AU, with a different ending to the musical. And, yeah, it was pretty good. Intrigue, new characters, the world being fleshed out, etc. All that good stuff.

And then the ending came. That bullshit, insulting, dickheaded ending. The world starts to fall apart, with whole cities dying and hero and villain orgs fighting for domination, as well as civil war within the Evil League of Evil. 'All right!', I thought, 'shit's getting real!' And then...one of the characters, Penny, goes back in time and makes everything happen in canon.

(my review)
" No. No, no, no. I HATE it when fanfic writers do this. When I read a story that's an AU, I do NOT want canon compliance! That's actually kind of the point! I'm a reader, and I feed off of raw creativity! Resetting everything to canon at the end is NOT creative! It's been done fifty billion times! I - calming down. Happy thoughts. You are a fanfic author. You have the power to write a completely different ending from canon. But, please, please don't do this."

 

I just recently ran into a story that was sort of an extreme version of this. The author kept adding notes in the middle of the story in the style of "I can't be bothered to repeat the sorting hat's song so you can read it from sorcerer's stone page 26-27" or "I think the chess match is boring and I can't really write chess so if you want read sorcerer's stone page 172-178". Seriously?

The next story I opened, I read the first chapter which seemed bad. It was short and I was bored so I figured I could check out another chapter before clicking close. The next three chapters only contained "This chapter is NC-17 so I can't post it on ff.net, go read it on my livejournal". I guess the moral of the story is that I shouldn't read bad quality fics and I hate authors who expect me to jump through hoops instead of just reading the story.

 

This may sound strange, crazy even, but I don't like action scenes. As in fighting. I happen to think they are boring and do not advance the plot properly.

That's not really a bad thing, action scenes have their place, I'm sure of it. But I'm just not a fan of them.

 

Action scenes need to mean something. It can't just be two people fighting. It has to be the two of them, all the things they stand for, as well as all the people they fight for.

That is why Changes was awesome and the fight in Cold Days at the end was kinda meh.

 

Wizarding duels don't have to be boring, though. I also find myself skimming them a lot but a decent author can really make them good. I know in terms of practicality that stunners and unforgivables are basically all you'd ever need but goddamn that is monotonous. At the same time it also drags a little if the author gets too wrapped up in describing the details of dodging, shielding etc. There is a balance to be found, jbern's dueling scenes come to mind as good examples.

Anyway, it;s probably been mentioned a few times, but drawn out Quidditch scenes are really painful to read. Really I prefer fics where Harry finds an excuse not to play for whatever reason.

 

Oh, I've thought of more! I must have a lot of bile in me. Huh.

Anyway, abusive Lucius. Yeah, NO. Lucius loving his son is his one redeeming feature, and in fact is one of HP's few moral complexities.

He's a Death Eater...but he also loves his son! Inexcusable! He's a Death Eater, and therefore pure evil! He must abuse Draco regularly, it's the only explanation, and helpfully sets Draco up to be taken care of by a sympathetic Harry, and then they'll kiss and everything will be alright. I operate on simplistic Back & White morality, thank you very much!

Urgh.