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New and Almost Recommended Harry Potter Fanfiction

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Dark Minion, Sep 20, 2014.

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  1. A.K.$J6-J5

    A.K.$J6-J5 Seventh Year

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    Edited the post,:facepalm
     
  2. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    kokopelli posted chapter 2 of By Rights of Conquest.

    The first chapter is basically pretty decoration; at its core, it's the old marry-her-or-she-loses-her-magic plot. So the story now has the same problem every story with a marriage contract suffers from -- it's got a marriage contract.

    Can any of the fellow writers here explain to me what the appeal of that particular plot is? Because I really can't figure it out. I mean, obviously it's a Shortcut To Pairing, but I'd think kokopelli wouldn't need that crutch, so there has to be a different reason. I just don't see it.
     
  3. Perspicacity

    Perspicacity Destroyer of Worlds ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    I've not read the latest chapter but yeah, not a direction I like to see stories going. It's cheap instaconflict, a boring plot device by modern standards.

    There's a bit of discussion by the author here. Relevant recent comments:

     
  4. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    It's a short-cut to pairing that authors manage to bullshit themselves into thinking actually constitutes challenging and interesting drama, forcing characters into situations that're not comfortable with, making them develop and grow, creating a romance that isn't a romance but then develops into a romance.
     
  5. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    Shit authors do that, Taure. But there has to be more than that, if certain people find it interesting enough to write 500,000 word behemoths on that plot. So kokopelli thinks it's "fun". I guess we have phenomenal differences on what constitutes as "fun", then.

    Edit:
    @Pers; Otherwise it's decent enough. It's a fluffy little story/chapter, with an IC-Canon!Harry and a nice, girl-next-door-Daphne -- but it's all overshadowed by the fact that dates and getting to know each other is only due to the contract. And that, as opposed to said 500,000 word story, it's not even used as a means of conflict, but Harry already likes her by the end of the second chapter, so they'll wed, be happy and that's that.

    I mean, where's the story there?
     
  6. Baradine

    Baradine Seventh Year

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    I can't speak for the author, obviously, but maybe he'll do something with remnant Death Eaters? That seems to be a popular point for post-Deathly Hallows stories.
     
  7. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    I doubt that, as it's going to be a shorter story, but who knows. I stopped reading it here, at any case, perhaps I'll have another look once it's finished.

    That aside, I'm really puzzled by his replies to my reviews. Don't Like, Don't Read never made any sense when applied to the first chapters (how would you know before reading?), Write Before You Criticise is bad form (nevermind that in a funny coincidence I do write), and it's like he hasn't really read my last comment at all. I'm not quite sure we've been reading the same words, at any rate. Not caring for my opinion is fine, but that doesn't preclude me from posting it, and then why even respond at all?
     
  8. sirius009

    sirius009 Minister of Magic

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    "Death Before Dishonour" had another good update. It includes an interesting Potions scene and a good scene with the Bloody Baron. I am, however, worried about the pacing. Either way, another couple of chapters and it could be ready for the Library.
     
  9. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    What are Neville and Ron doing in NEWT potions? o_O
    I don't see it. Must be a mistake, surely?

    Also, inflated House points are inflated.
     
  10. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    It's not the only error. The content is good, but the writing is riddled with basic mistakes like apostrophe use, and stylistic problems like massive word repetition.

    On top of that, the author doesn't quite know what he should write and what he should leave to the reader's imagination to fill in, so describes everything with extreme detail. Every single physical movement of Harry getting out of bed was described, as was his bathroom routine. The shaving bit works I guess, as it shows something about the character, but for the rest he could have just written "He showered and dried off before moving to the mirror to shave".

    You see it again at breakfast. The end result is a lot of words but not much content, as so many of the words are "logistics" rather than plot, characterisation or worldbuilding.
     
  11. Download

    Download Auror ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Has he got a beta yet? These are all things that could be fixed with one.
     
  12. blizzarrrd

    blizzarrrd Fourth Year

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    No. In the A/N at the beginning of his latest chapter he said he was looking for one.
     
  13. Supernova26

    Supernova26 Muggle

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    Hi, i'm the author of Death before Dishonour. Thank you for the helpful pointers. I'll definitely try to work on the areas that have been pointed out for improvement. I've read back through the first section of the third chapter and your right it does drag on a bit with unnecessary details. I'll try hard not to repeat it.

    I'm working on getting a beta. I just want to make sure that I get one who's the right fit. There are so many advertising themselves on FF that I'm finding it hard to narrow it down to one that will be helpful to me. I don't want to end up with one who doesn't really fix the issues I have.

    Thank you once again for the helpful pointers. Hopefully it'll help me improve and make this story better.
     
  14. Eilyfe

    Eilyfe Supreme Mugwump

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    You can always post your new chapters in the Work by Author section of the forum. From typos to plot holes, there isn't much that escapes the people there (I know it helped me a bunch).
     
  15. Tutorial Boss

    Tutorial Boss Seventh Year

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    It's happened, guys - the culmination of all Indy!Harry fics. This fic is a guilty pleasure that has all those problems, the infinite money, the random powerups... in SPACE.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10784770/1/Harry-Potter-Geth

    It's so cringeworthy, and it updates daily and is already finished. I'm finding a guilty little pleasure in it, though, which is surprising, and it's a good time-waster if nothing else.
     
  16. golan

    golan Temporarily Banhammered DLP Supporter

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    Is it necessary to know anything about Mass Effect to enjoy this fic?
     
  17. Tutorial Boss

    Tutorial Boss Seventh Year

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    So far it's just a canon rehash, so I'd assume not. And you can't really say "enjoy" - I don't think it's good enough for that xD Like, almost almost reccomended.
     
  18. golan

    golan Temporarily Banhammered DLP Supporter

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    Well, I'm reading a "guilty pleasure" fic now, too (Harry's Madness by SilverLocke980). Wasn't updated since more then 8 years, though :(:(:(
     
  19. Hero of Stupidity

    Hero of Stupidity Villain of Sensibility ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    What I don't understand is why post it 1chapter/day if it is completed? with ~6k word chapters it will be an eternity before we can read teh full thing. Shit is not raven guys.
     
  20. MonkeyEpoxy

    MonkeyEpoxy The Cursed Child DLP Supporter

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    5/5. Move past go, collect $200, keep circling.
     
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