Well it is a parody bordering on crack so it makes some sense there.

That said I feel that the mistake people make when having children advanced for their age is applying that to everything instead of just the areas the child is interested/focused in and accounting for things that only personal experience can really teach.

 

A pet peeve of mine is when Harry goes back in time and meets Snape only for past Snape get a hard on for Harry because he is so much a great guy.

 

I deplore all those time-traveling fics where Harry's all about defending poor little Snape from the big and nasty Marauders. God damn, any rational person would just throw an AK at Snape's nose and be done with the fucker.

 

That would be better than feeding him to Remus. Snape'd upset his stomach

 

This used to bother me, but then I realized that I disliked reading about 11-year-olds that actually act like they're 11 even more.

 

Precisely.

 

I think there's a balance. Don't turn them into virtual adults, but don't turn them into actual kids either. Rowling generally did a good job with this line and managed to keep the characters interesting in their younger years without aging them up mentally.

 

Actually, I wouldn't mind seeing a fic whey they act exactly like 11 year olds.

 

Have you talked to an 11 year old recently? I can't remember the last time I talked to one and walked away thinking that it was a reasonably articulated conversation that was worth my time. The sweet spot seems to be writing them as if they were 14 or so.

 

I have a 10yo cousin who is remarkably articulate. I prefer 11yos in stories to be unusually but not impossibly mature for their age.

 

One thing to keep in mind: eleven year olds aren't completely aware of their own immaturity. Think back - it wasn't that long ago for most of us. You probably thought you were a grown-up, but at the same time, you had no clue of how to get some shit done, and you might have written it off as something your parents/guardians would handle. Because it's boring grown-up stuff.

Rowling did have it right, but she was writing children's lit. Depending on the rating, fanfic authors have quite a lot of freedom. I can't remember anyone in my school who didn't swear at least once a day in Year 7 (that's going too far, but you get the point).

 

No... Its really not. I remember when I was 12 very clearly (it wasn't that long ago, really) and we swore a lot.

 

I can recall two fics doing this well... Though neither by name. One basically has the kids acting like kids, setting up plays and different kinds of magic-related activities.

Then there's the one told from the different teacher's perspective, featuring trans!Hermione, brain-damaged!Harry.

I rather enjoyed the second, because of how the teachers were all aware of what the kids were doing, while the kids thought they were being super smart and sneaky.

 

That was my point. I'd like to see a fic like that just for the sake of novelty.

 

Probably been mentioned before; the idea that the Malfoys are new money. I was reading a fanfic today that was going quite well until they reached the Diagon Alley scene. Then the author took great care to specifically mention that the Malfoys came over to England in the 1800's.

Also in this same fic; the Goblins jaw dropping surprise when Harry is polite to them and their subsequent willingness to help him in any way they can from that point onwards.

One of these I could have let go, but both together caused me to abandon ship asap.

 

I've started dropping fics immediately where Goblins are anything other than overwhelmingly cuntish.

 

I like false nice, and sarcastic polite. But 'letmelickyourbuttholeyouholyjesuswizardforrememberingmypitifulnameongodslittleearth' makes me want to hurl.

 

I heard this described as 'Dances with Goblins'.

I wonder if that means there's opportunity for a Harry/GoblinGirl re-imagining of Dances with Wolves in the fandom?

 

I've always wanted to write a scene (and probably will in my main fic) that's a double inversion of the "Harry is nice to goblins; good things happen" trope.

Basically, the idea is that Harry calls Griphook by name, and his attitude is that he's kind of bestowing a special honor on him by remembering his name. But, he calls every goblin Griphook. It's played like he's oblivious, and the goblins snipe at him and subtly spit in his face for it. And then, on the way out, he reveals to a third party that the best gift he could give the goblins is the gift of being a little twit of a wizard stereotype so they can bond over insulting him at the water cooler.