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Complete A Cadmean Victory by DarknessEnthroned - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Skeletaure, Aug 20, 2015.

  1. Sauce Bauss

    Sauce Bauss Second Year ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    He is, and they do. Slytherin's portrait explicitly mentions Voldemort had done all of those rituals in his school years, and a great many more besides. The only rituals Harry has done are explicitly the two or three that have next to no risk. Other rituals require much greater sacrifice.
     
  2. Lungs

    Lungs KT Loser ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    I usually agree with zombie about fics, but after reading this for a while, I'm starting to get really... bored of it, I guess.

    It started out alright, but I think that the weakest bit's always been the Fleur interactions. It's become kinda meh to read, and kind of forgettable for me.
     
  3. Zombie

    Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter

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    I tend to agree but the issue is that the author sucks at romance and is letting it be the focus. The death and vengeance would be much better if they focused on it.

    I have this weird nostalgia feeling about this story I feel like I've read it before. Then again I've read so many fics but they all tend to run together anymore.

    Also my arguments earlier in the thread isn't about the greatness of this story. I rate based on how well this passes the time. far it has but my interest wanes with the fact that the iodupdate rate has stagnated.
     
    Last edited: Oct 22, 2015
  4. Hawkin

    Hawkin Chief Warlock

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    While I liked the update rate, I feel like there was 1 chapter in 5 that actually provided plot advancement. Perhaps with his now more limited time, the author will focus more on plot and less on filler; although the last chapter did not fill me with hope.
     
  5. dhulli

    dhulli The Reborn

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    3/5, decent time waster. It has its moments and then bad moments. The author just has no idea when or how to capitalize on the good parts. Just when I'm thinking, oh this is good, it's already over.

    Kreacher mention is obvious, gearing up for a conflict at DoM. Might be exciting.
     
  6. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    Every H/Fleur fic I've seen that's set at Hogwarts does the same thing to an extent. The most common reason for them to get together is because "they both know what it's like to be stared at" or some stupid crap like that.

    But I mean, you have to have something to base their relationship on, I don't blame the authors for coming up with these stupid reasons. Three years isn't a huge age difference when you're an adult, but when you're a teenager it's the difference between a senior in high school and a freshman. The head cheerleader doesn't go out with a new freshman kid who just finished junior high. It's kinda hard to make it believable that a drop dead gorgeous 17 year old starts going out with a scrawny 14 year old.

    The best reason is that he's not just any scrawny 14 year old, he's the Justin Bieber of 14 year olds and could probably get any girl he wanted if he tried... but that just makes Fleur out to be shallow, so that won't work.
     
  7. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    Well, there's nothing per se wrong with a shallow Fleur. I mean, I'd rather read that than the umpteenth woe-is-me-Im-beautiful. There's a lot of potential there for a light-hearted tale.

    The problem is rather that Canon!Harry is the antithesis of someone who'd find that attractive (or is it? Harry aspiring to be 'normal' is Canon, right?) So you'd have to twist his character a lot to make that plausible, but then again, that's what this story does anyway.

    Which is one reason why I don't accept the "well, they have to do something to make it work"-argument. If it's supposedly hard to make plot X workable (this is still debatable, btw -- just handwaving the reason for Fleur to be interested in Harry probably works just fine), and you can't find any reasonable solution, then just don't write it. Or conversely, if you do, don't expect leniency on account of difficulty. It's not like there's a lack of different plots out there that are easier.
     
  8. Warhawk

    Warhawk Squib

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    I agree with you that writing a believable scenario is really hard, but my main problem with these nonsense reasons to push them together is that there are in my opinion so many better options that would lead to interaction between Harry and Fleur without debasing the characters.

    The easiest way would be to follow canon till the second task in GoF, or you could use rumors of his former years at Hogwarts that reach Fleur and make her at least curious. Anything from a complete AU to a small change like in Letters works fine, too. Of course is it awfully convenient that out of all people these two get paired up, but if the following interaction is well done it's not a major problem for me.
     
  9. TheMcConaissance

    TheMcConaissance Squib

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    Above average harry/fleur fic which isn't hard to achieve really. 3/5
     
  10. Jormungandr

    Jormungandr Prisoner

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    Honestly, there's still more chemistry between Katie Bell and Harry than he and Fleur. Somewhere along the way, the H/F fizzled and died, and all we've got is this zombie that's being forced through the hoops of a plot.

    That's a bad thing, given the aims of the fic.
     
  11. dhulli

    dhulli The Reborn

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    Two more chapters and I have to say, the DoM scenes were handled pretty well. Despite
    the reasons for voldemort leaving him alive being tenuous at best.
     
  12. d4st

    d4st Squib

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    Strange how the new chapters are better when there is no mention of Fleur...
     
  13. Rubribreza

    Rubribreza Squib

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    Well, I wouldn't say that the latest couple of chapters are miles above the ones with Fleur in them, but yeah, they are a bit better.
    It seems that the author has some great plot points and twists, nice, original ideas and that is all so fine and awesome. However, all the threads that connect those events together are so weak. Remember the repetitive use of Neville and Fleur interactions with a dash of Katie added to the mix in order to pave the road from one point to another? It is just the way it is. I sort of got used to it now.
    I rather liked the Voldemort interactions for they are original, so a big plus just for that. Nothing groundbreaking in the scene, but original, so I liked it.
    The cliffhanger from the chapter before was rather lame, though.
    I strongly hope that the Fleur interactions will get better once they start living together.
     
  14. LoyalFenian

    LoyalFenian Fourth Year

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    I strongly hope that Voldemort just turns up out of the blue, kicks the fuck out of Harry, and murders Fleur. Just to get this shitty romance over with.

    This type of Harry (Vengeful, vindictive, angry and so very hateful towards the world) would be sent down a beautiful path of self destruction, death, and vengencance. I'd love to see how he would react.
     
  15. Odran

    Odran Fourth Champion

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    Isn't that pretty much implied with the title?

     
  16. Zel

    Zel High Inquisitor

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    There were plenty of changes but so far Sirius not dying and Harry and Voldemort's dynamics are the only major divergences, his relationship with Fleur and Umbridge's death aside. Honestly, I would rather see the whole thing going REALLY cadmean and have Voldemort kill Fleur. Harry's subesequent downfall would be pretty interesting.
     
  17. onlytoask

    onlytoask Squib

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    I really wanted to like it for the eventual Harry/Fleur, but I get past the second chapter. To me at least, the writing seems awkward and Harry's characterization is infuriating.
     
  18. SeekingSerenity

    SeekingSerenity Third Year

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    Who the heck is this MC?. His character development started so fast and so abruptly and now he can't even be identified with Harry even remotely. I finally stopped caring about this story.

    Voldemort letting Harry go after witnessing the murder Bella for the sole reason to sate his curiosity was the final straw. Even if his monolithic arrogance coupled with ongoing insanity was the primary driving force behind his actions, he would have never,and i mean absolutely never go out of his way to spare Harry.

    When did "true love" at the tender age of 18 years was the reason to justify your psychotic BF Fleur ? For a girl of your upbringing? It's obvious what you feel is infatuation. And whats with that shitty EVIL!DUMBLES .

    If Dumbledore had a speck of evil within him, Harry had 0% chance to notice his potential manipulations. Yes, because apparating after Voldemort and Harry "DUELED" were part of his actions for the inevitable GRAND SCHEME towards the greater good with the goal to making a martyr out of Harry, are in fact preferable to the potential death of the ONLY person who can off Voldemort. Just what?????? After spending a lot of time and word space explaining Dumbedore's ironclad belief in the prophesy?

    It had a lot of potential and while the author is capable of writing, the story went down the drain fast with the bad characterisation(don't get me started with the rituals )which made them feel fake and shallow, like watching through a filter.

    I'm hoping my critique can be taken with an open mind.
    For what it's worth those were my 2 cents, yet at the end of the day i'm just a person behind a shiny rectangular window typing vigorously on the keyboard.:colbert:
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2015
  19. Silly

    Silly Third Year

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    I tried reading this because it's Harry/Fleur and who doesn't like hot French babes?

    I couldn't make it past the second chapter. First of all, I definitely agree that the characterization of Harry is a little jarring. We kind of just get thrown into the middle of a standard GoF event (the World Cup), except Harry is completely different, which just reads really weird to me.

    But the biggest issue for me is definitely the writing style. This may just have been because I was reading about a scene that already appears in the novel, but there is way too much dialogue/internal monologue/etc. and way too little "things actually happening". Now don't get me wrong. Things do happen in the first few chapters, but the author never really makes the effort to truly show me events happening. We just get told that events are taking place, and things mostly happen as a side note, in order to drive the dialogue along. It doesn't help that the World Cup is a canon event, so the author mostly glosses over it and just states "oh yeah and that thing that happened in canon also happened here" without telling us about it.

    If the story gets better after the first few chapters I could be persuaded to read it, but for now its definitely not my cup of tea.

    I don't really feel comfortable rating this at the moment, since I've only read a fraction of the story, but the little bit that I've seen would place it around a 2/5 in my book.
     
  20. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw DLP Overlord Admin DLP Supporter

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    It's a decent enough guilty pleasure fic, but the jarring character changes really don't stop. If you want a good way to use an afternoon, this might be your cup of tea. I'm actually quite enjoying it, problems aside.

    Features Salazar Slytherin the portrait as a mentor.
     
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