Harry said sarcastically.

Harry growled aggressively.

Harry moaned painfully.

Harry raised his eyebrows quizzically.

Harry scratched his arse fervently.

Harry masturbated furiously to an appealingly revealing photograph of a beautiful, willowy veela.

For heaven's sake, it's like some people just found out that adjectives and adverbs are things that exist and decided that they gotta have 'em all. I get it, every dish needs seasoning, but just dumping a bucket of everything on top of the plate is not the correct way to do that. Aaand that metaphor ran away from me.

Also, I fear that if I read one more time how someone smiles or shrugs their dialogue, I'll fly into a psychotic rage and won't stop until my neighborhood is a wasteland of scorched earth and broken glass.

 

Shrugging words at the others in morse code seems viable . What if it's some form of interpretive dance, where Harry uses smiles and shrugs to go full Squidward on the readers/others and they simply don't comprehend the pure genius of his eloquent expressions?

edit: added picture for clarity

https://coubsecure-a.akamaihd.net/g...2d7495/1411294525_1392020591_1llzms4_o5ni.gif

 

Für Das Größere Wohl did a pretty good job with a custom-made wand. The kid is given a series of regular 'test' wands to figure out an ideal combination, a sample of his blood is used for a better connection, the wand did cost money, and it is pretty clear the whole process is done all the time.

 

It is.

The wizard's robes were distained with potion remnants.

The wizard was distained by his son's actions.

Both uses are archaic, but they are actual English words.

 

Allow me to rephrase:

For the purposes of the average fanfic writer, 'distain' is not a word. Should that word appear in any fan fic in a situation where the author clearly meant 'disdain,' then it is equally clear that it did so because they dun goofed, and not because they are an etymologist, a linguist, were writing in poetic metre, or were born in the heady days when speaking middle French and contracting the Bubonic plague were all the rage.

tl/dr:

:mrgreen:

 

5/5 would read.

 

For some reason the word "chuckled" really pisses me off. It's a legitimate word, can certainly be used properly, but I just connect it with poorly written fanfics way too much.

"Harry, with his newfound confidence, found Ron and Hermione entirely tiresome and chuckled."

"Dumbledore chuckled, 'My boy, why would you think that?' "

grr...

 

What, you mean FF writers have a limited vocabulary?

And, how would you contract the Bubonic plague? Bub'nic plague? Bu'nic plague?

In all seriousness, yeah, most of the time it's simply a mistake. It makes the fics that use such words appropriately without coming across pretentious a rare commodity in FFland.

 

Somewhere along the line, everyone confused cunning with preaching.

 

Harry Potter the most cunning man alive announced his impending break in at Gringotts just to see what would happen.

 

Eh, most fics that have Cunning!Harry (or so they say) dumb down everyone else, and let's not even get started on Manipulative!Dumbledore. A puppet master that has a finger on every pie, controls the whole government from the shadows and manipulates the young through his privileged position as Headmaster of an important school...has all his plans picken apart by a thirteen years old boy.

Yep, as I said, it's easy to be cunning when everyone else is dumb.

 

Welcome to Harry Crow.

 

Never wasted my time reading it, someone told me that the author apparently thinks eleven years old Hermione is sexy.

That, and the whole goblin stuff. It's dumb.

 

I lost a bet and had to read it. Got to chapter 22 I think and then gave up. After showing my friend- who had only heard about the fic and not actually read it- some of the scenes, he agreed that 22 chapters was more than enough -_-.

Also... Harry Amidst the Vaults of Stone blows it out of the water and has a similar premise, and I don't even like that fic that much.

 

Ha I dropped it around the same time. Centurion Crow can suck it.

 

...I'm not quite sure you picked up the innuendo...

 

"Bubonic's comin'. Plague'll kill ya."

I'm going to assume this is based on something within the narrative of a story and not, say, an author's note, blog entry, or personal communication. If not, mea culpa. Bearing that in mind: Well, that's the most ignorant thing I've read today, but I suppose there's still time for someone else to top it.

Oh look, a rant...

Spoiler

Why not mention how 11-year-old Hermione also found 11-year old Harry to be "too gorgeous even for Jane Austen to do justice?" I guess that's also supposed to be indicative of the author's personal... interests?

To be fair to the author, two 'tweens' found each other attractive. It happens. And children that age also become infatuated with older children, as well (all the time, in fact, with tween girls, considering that demographic's reaction to boy bands and the like). Not everyone stays in the 'girls/boys have cooties' phase until they're old enough to drive.

I know it's harder to separate a character's interests and opinions from the writer's when the medium in question is fanfiction, since the involvement of the author is more visible and they have a tendency to inject a lot of their own voice into the characters because they are less professional (both in skill and attitude) and self-inserts/author-avatars are a thing, but one should always be wary of confusing the character for the author.

Say what you will about the quality of his writing, but people making thinly-veiled accusations of deviancy for the ludicrous reason that two of his characters were attracted to each other is more than just a little unfair.

For the record, I checked and the the actual word "sexy" appears only 4 times in Harry Crow (still more than any other individual Robst story to date), with none of those instances referring to Hermione. Two of those examples are adult women talking/thinking about adult men (with one being a woman thinking about her husband's confidence, not his body). One is something Padma says, in jest, about Harry for the express purpose of embarrassing/flustering him and Hermione. One is fourteen-year-old Neville thinking about Padma (which, at a glance, also seemed to be more about abstract qualities, like fearlessness and skill).

The word is also used to describe a new television screen, in his story A Different Halloween: So, clearly, the author also suffers from some kind of technology-focused paraphilia.

Considering the number of people writing hardcore smutfic starring characters of that same young age (or one of them, paired with someone in their 30s, yikes), like every second author at, say, AFF (and many at FFN, until the mods step in), it always strikes me as bizarre when people walk right by those stories without batting an eye, in order to point an accusing finger at a story like Harry Crow. Is it considered more offensive, supposedly more indicative of hidden proclivities, because it has an actual attempt at a plot?

Please, knock that shit off.

By all means, judge the stories based on the quality of the writing, therein, but for fuck's sake please refrain from judging an author's morality or psychoanalyzing them over piddling little shit like their describing two tweens experiencing a normal-to-the-point-of-banality case of infatuation. I suppose George R. R. Martin is also a mad-dog rapist who engages in murder and incest when he thinks he can get away with it, or at least secretly wants to? I mean, he wrote about characters who enjoy that kind of thing, so he must be into it in real life, right?

Right??? :facepalm

Kudos to any author who is cognizant of the fact some people will make asinine assumptions about their morality based on the content of their fiction, and is still brave enough to put it out there.

 

Honestly I just thought his story was boring as shit and Harry having super goblin magic was dumb as fuck.

Then I stopped reading. Like after the first class in Hogwarts where he's playing with a magic knife.

 

That's quite the rant you just gave, but it was kind of...well, unecessary. To be honest, I assumed that the author said it himself explicitlly. I'll try to not judge before I read it myself then, thank you!

 

Do not waste your time with it, unless you are very very new to fanfiction and/or very very young.. This warlocke's rant (though one of his weaker) was more amusing than entirety of Harry Crow.