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WIP A Practical Guide to Evil by Erraticerrata - T - Original Fantasy

Discussion in 'Original Fiction' started by DvorakQ, Apr 14, 2016.

  1. theronin

    theronin Order Member

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    If I remember right, the Red Skies effect is him dismantling a giant ward or something similar, so I don't think him dying would end it.
     
  2. Nazgus

    Nazgus Headmaster

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    It's described as a weakening of the boundary between a Hell and Creation using wards. So while it might stop weakening if the wards are tied to his life (which I'm not sure they are), I imagine it will stay weakened for a while.
     
  3. Imraefi

    Imraefi Second Year

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    Well that was dumb.
     
  4. Shinysavage

    Shinysavage Madman With A Box Prestige

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    Huh. Not sure what I think of that.

    On the one hand...we haven't seen the body, and we only actually have Brad's word that she's dead. This is exactly the kind of story where those details could count.

    In addition, based on what we saw of the fight, it doesn't seem reasonable that Captain could have lost, given that she was utterly dominating it by the end of the scene.

    On the other hand, heroes scoring unreasonable victories is more or less Black's motivation, so it would make sense, and it fits on a wider thematic level as well.

    Either way though, this feels more like a whimper than the bang that had been built up.
     
  5. Nazgus

    Nazgus Headmaster

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    Warlock's reaction seems to confirm her being dead:
    I'm with you on it feeling more like a whimper than a bang though. Not very happy with how it all went down. And I mean that in the storytelling point of view, not the plot one.
     
  6. Stealthy

    Stealthy Fifth Year

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    The end of Sabah's bit also basically tells us that she's the one dying, especially after Warlock straight up kills Hedge. Cutting out before the kill is made means that, especially with all the death foreshadowing, the kill didn't happen and the Beast got decapitated. A lot of the comments are talking about being annoyed that Sabah didn't even use her third aspect, but then again they're also trying to use it to justify her survival so... yeah.

    Definitely didn't stick the landing here. Kinda underwhelming. Overall the fights were good, but not the conclusion.
     
  7. Nazgus

    Nazgus Headmaster

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    Reread to see if it would be better on the second round, and it just doesn't work for me. Not seeing it and just having Black react to it works terribly, and even though Warlock seems to confirm it I'm left unconvinced. The story Bard created seems too thin to turn the tide when Sabah seemed so in control of the fight last we left her. Having her die offscreen like that makes me think that there has to be something we're missing from how it all went down, but one of the Calamities has to die in this fight. If Cat is going to become the new power, the old one has to start waning, and I don't see that happening if they walk out of this unscathed. And lets be real here, anything that's not death is effectively unscathed for a Named.
     
  8. Lamora

    Lamora Definitely Not Batman

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    Fuck, I've just realized how Warlock is going to die. His husband is a devil. They're fighting the Diabolist.

    Right in front of our very eyes the whole time. Christ.
     
  9. Mutton

    Mutton Unspeakable

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    Way too in universe obvious to the point where I half expect trying it is what is going to lead to her downfall
     
  10. Spacegnom

    Spacegnom First Year

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    Maybe I'm just paying more attention, but I feel like the typos are getting worse. This plus the weird conclusion (?) to the last few interludes has me abit worried about this story. I guess we will see what happens when the "3-chapters per week" patreon goal is hit.
    That said the fireplace scene at the end of this chapter was glorious.
    Anyone else wondering who the 3 other students of Ranger are? For a second I thought Archer might have referred to Warlock, Black and Malica. But, I doubt they were ever real 'students' of Ranger.
     
  11. Stealthy

    Stealthy Fifth Year

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    I think Black's the only one who really qualified as a student among the Calamities, but I imagine Archer's referring to recent ones. They haven't been mentioned yet.

    I don't think it's getting worse, but errata just really needs a beta simply to proof the typos. English is his second language. Does pretty well with it for the most part but gotta compensate by getting a native speaker to proof the grammar. Two and a half books in and he hasn't gotten one, so not really expecting that to ever happen.
     
  12. Spacegnom

    Spacegnom First Year

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    Well, that was a chapter heavy with foreshadowing...
    Sounds like the King of Winter is the one at fault for all this mess. I used to think that he took the heart purely out of spite. But, now I think a piece of Callow/Catherine is what he wanted all along. The Winter King might just end up being the "endboss fight" of this Book.
    I don't know, if the "Six times the coming of my title" theory has been posted here before:
    "I bought us at least six months until anything goes down.
    Six times the coming of my title, the King of Winter had said. Overly dramatic phrasing but at least I had a number."
    The theory postulates that Catherine is wrong and that this means 6 months - 1 month per usage of Fall (which creates 'moonless nights').
    In Close (3.32) Catherine thinks she still has "three months and some" left. But, if the theory holds true, it could be that she has only one month and some to regain her heart. Including up to one month she has to spend waiting for the Queen of Summer.
    Another interesting thing that was brought up once again was that Summer and Winter can't be at war with the same foe. So, I would be very disappointed if we don't see Cat make use of this 'Rule' before the end.
     
  13. Stealthy

    Stealthy Fifth Year

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    I feel like I've said it before but the King of Winter wants to break the pattern, just like Black. And both are using Cat as the means to do it.

    Also that theory kinda works, if only because it means that her time runs out after this final battle against the Queen.
     
  14. Lion

    Lion Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    This chapter makes me think that Cat's name will have to do with breaking patterns in some way. Her getting White Knight while still being aligned with "evil" would be a really good flip, but I'd be more excited for some new or forgotten name. Something that comes out of left field but has hints laid out in the story.
     
  15. Nazgus

    Nazgus Headmaster

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    Not a fan of the newest update. It's nearly 100% telling and not showing.
     
  16. Stealthy

    Stealthy Fifth Year

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    The pacing on this chunk of the story could be better, and yeah this was definitely another monologue chapter. Just give us a repeat of the Commanders interlude. That was a damn good chapter, and I'd love to have gotten Ranker's or Afolabi's perspective here.

    The bonus chapter was great, though.
     
  17. Nazgus

    Nazgus Headmaster

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    Chapters where Cat does nothing should be from the perspective of other characters. I'd rather have an interlude than a chapter of her describing everything going on around her. She doesn't work very well as a passive voice.
     
  18. Stealthy

    Stealthy Fifth Year

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    Looks like Errata learned that lesson for this chapter. Thank god.
     
  19. Touzb

    Touzb Squib

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    Thanks to seeing the Guide being discussed here I've read it somewhat slowly over the previous few weeks. I'll post my random thoughts. Hopefully at this point in the thread noone will mind some spoilers.

    • The pacing in notably non-standard, much faster that I expected. Even the first chapter betrays expectations. Up to a certain point in it I imagined book 1 getting maybe as far as Catherine meeting one of The Calamities and getting involved with them. But that happens towards the end of the very same chapter.
    • Catherine's friends/companions from the legion feel either underdeveloped or underused in the case of the previously developed ones. Especially the Kilian romance feels pointless in retrospect and its accompanying drama meaningless. Yeah, perhaps it leads to some kind of point - Catherine is already realizing she can't be a Vicequeen and lead a huge army while keeping the spirt of "ragtag group of friends" alive - but at this point it doesn't feel like good writing.
    • Too much of the story is filled with descriptions of fights between armies. They're no longer interesting to me and I tend to skip paragraphs that clearly focus only on mass battle tactics. If it's Catherine or someone fighting alone, I can swallow it.
    • I want to see more exploration of the setting. Out of book 3 I most liked the parts that did it - Catherine lying her way to the Winter Court in Arcadia (the whole fae ordeal sadly amounted to too many mass battles), the Free Cities interludes, the extra chapter about the origins of Archer.
    • Overall the background stuff is way more interesting than Catherine's foreground story and that's not good.

    • The resolution of the current arc/book will decide the Guide's fate in my eyes. Akua has been built up as Catherine's rival from the very beginning; people, me included, want to see her get what she deserves. Hopefully her ultimate plan and the way its dealt with end up being interesting, preferably with the accompanying mass battles being done with fast. Whatever twists end up happening, whoever ends up dying, book 4 should represent a clean break that presents a new dynamic to the story, something else than "Catherine keeps getting a bigger army to command" that arguably continues since the War College in book 1.
     
    Last edited: Dec 21, 2017
  20. Lamora

    Lamora Definitely Not Batman

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    Same on what Touzb said.

    The last two books were really, really good. They were tight, had an arc, and a satisfying conclusion (imo, obviously).

    This book 3 is positively dragging ass. Don't get me wrong, there were parts that were awesome - the knights of Callow, seeing the Calamities be big and bad and watching them fall - but this book honestly should have been two separate ones.

    The whole Fae thing stretched this thing way too far - not that it was bad, mind you. But trying to tie up the Fae and Akua in one book has caught us in this sort protracted climax arc that is getting old as shit waiting for the conclusion.

    Book 2 was about 63 chapters, counting interludes and not counting extra chapters. It felt long, sure, but ended just about the right time.

    Book 3 is currently 71 chapters and feels like me like it still has a fat dozen left in the tank. Akua needs to die, Catherine needs to hit a huge unexpected pivot or something awesome needs to happen to get us pumped for Book 4, or Book 3 is going to end on a decidedly Subway sandwich note - plenty of fine ingredients, total mess.

    Anaxares becoming Hierarch could be that jumpstart if we knew better what the fuck the significance of that was. Unfortunately, instead of telling and not showing or vice versa in this case, the author has committed the sin of the third option, both not telling and not showing, making it a pretty muted note.