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Abandoned Harry Potter and the Soul's Struggle by Avitus88 - M

Discussion in 'General Fics' started by Avitus, Feb 11, 2007.

  1. Avitus

    Avitus Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    May 1, 2005
    Messages:
    375
    Location:
    Canada
    Title: Harry Potter and the Soul's Struggle
    Author: Avitus88
    Rating: M (R)
    Genre: Action/Adventure, Drama
    DLP Category: Independant Harry
    Pairing: None
    Chapters: 2
    Words: 11,827
    Updated: September 15, 2006
    Published: August 16, 2006
    Status: Abandoned

    Summary: [PostHBP] Harry abandons his friends to track down Voldemort's Horcruxes, along the way he is able to find his own identity and to become the Wizard he is destined to be.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3108845/1/


    Originally my submission for the Summer '06 Horcrux Challenge. I've finally gotten around to finishing up the third chapter, it's getting darker and more serious. Not going to be a long fic, probably 6 chapters in total. I'm including an altered Black Family Tree, so you can see the background i'm working from. Please bear with the lack of page breaks in the second chapter... FF.net is gay as we all know... I'll fix it when I upload the third part.



    Checked by Minion, March 10, 2013
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 10, 2013
  2. deathinapinkboa

    deathinapinkboa Minister of Magic

    Joined:
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    I read it a while ago. It's good, but lacking in length. Please update. I've just reread it and I enjoyed it ever so much.

    Edit: By the way, nice job on the Black Family Tree.
     
  3. mcatrage

    mcatrage Raptured to Hell

    Joined:
    May 16, 2006
    Messages:
    198
    Location:
    USA
    Good story, I like the path it is going. I agree with your viewpoint of the 6th book in how Dumbledore would of taught Harry some things during all the time together. So that means no weak!harry.

    I guess I'll keep an eye on it and hopefully this 3rd chapter will come soon.

    3.5/5
     
  4. Mordecai

    Mordecai Drunken Scotsman –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    I enjoyed it at the time, and I enjoyd rereading it just now. Im glad that you're picking it up again.

    4/5
     
  5. KenderCleric

    KenderCleric Lord of Plot Bunnies

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2006
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    Terra Atlantus
    A fairly decent read. Bonus points the way ch. 2 ends.

    3/5
     
  6. Cthulu

    Cthulu Unintelligent Bigot

    Joined:
    May 24, 2006
    Messages:
    107
    Ummm, is it just me that thinks that the family tree makes no sense what so ever?
    Hmm, no, I'm finally figuring it out... kinda...
    It gets confusing around Walburga Black, she mothered Sirius, Regulus, Alphard and Cygnus Black, right? Otherwise I'm totally confused


    And where did Pollux Black come from? :S
    His placing is impossible, since he is placed under Walburga who was born in 1925, but Pollux was born in 1912.
    On an off note: ahaahahahahahhaha, Riddle is a Weasley! (5 generations away, but that's besides the point)

    Ah, I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT!
    Cygnus (the first one) skipped a few lines, that's why it didn't make sense ^^


    Well then, here is my review:
    I greatly enjoyed reading it, and I'm looking forward to the next few chapters. HOWEVER, the lack of explanation to Harry's abilities other than "Dumbledore thought him" annoys me, as well as the fact that you didn't include the meeting with Remus and explanation as to WHY he didn't tell Harry about his home.
    But otherwise this is a great story and I highly recommend it to others, it could do with improvements, but in my book it still deserves a 4/5.
     
  7. Avitus

    Avitus Groundskeeper

    Joined:
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    Thanks for all the responses! As for Harry's abilities, i've put forth in the story that he was trained by Dumbledore, studies religiously in his spare time, and is constantly around Aurors... hopefully that will clear up some misconception about his skill levels (which are hardly well rounded).

    As for the tree... Pollux Black is the father of Walburga, Alphard and Cygnus (1938 ). The tree is all wonky because of the number of interconnecting branches. The tree splits in places and is continued with a numbered point, e.g. (1) Arcturus Black (1884 - 1954) is himself near the top of the tree, however his descendants are listed near the bottom. Also try to remember that parental or sibling links come from above, with children from the bottom. It's quite simple really.

    Oh yea, and Voldemort is Arthur Weasley's First Cousin (twice removed), and Molly's Third Cousin (once removed)... On the Black side of course (even though his father raped Amelia Crouch).
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2007
  8. Vulkan

    Vulkan Squib

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2007
    Messages:
    8
    Nice job on the Black family tree. Must ahve taken ages for you to do it. These relations often confuse me but this is very clear.
     
  9. ZanyMuggle

    ZanyMuggle Third Year

    Joined:
    May 18, 2006
    Messages:
    90
    Location:
    Texas, USA
    A worthy read.

    The turnaround in Petunia ('I'm proud to be your Aunt, Harry.') seems rather extreme. Has she ever even called him 'Harry' in the books.

    Harry's abilities have gotten awfully far in one or two years, compared to (for example) the beginning of Book 5 when Malfoy beats him up. Still, I prefer a capable Harry to an HBP-compliant Harry, so I like what you're doing.

    As I said before, I like it and look forward to more. 4/5
     
  10. afrojack

    afrojack Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    Yeah Malfoy beat him up at the start of Book 6, but we cant forget that Harry handed Malfoy's ass to him on a platter in the bathroom duel. That was my favorite part of the book, simply because Harry kicked that little idiot's ass to the edge and back again.

    And at the end of Book 5 when Harry's got his wand to his throat before the stupid prat's even got his wand out.
     
  11. gabriel

    gabriel First Year

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2006
    Messages:
    34
    just starting it, will edit when I finish, but I thought dumbledore explained to Harry in book six that the ministry cant tell the difference in wands only when magic is used in an area with only underage wizzards?

    just finished, so far so good, when I read HBP I wanted to believe a love potion was involved, so extra points for incorporating that! You put the beaver and weasel on the back burner, hope they stay there, I thought the gutter slut was put in her place w/ decorum, they were at a wedding, maybe have a deatheater smack her around later!! I guess the whole black and potter magic is gonna come into play later, and the changing of weasel clan's hair color? Draco is a pussy, him and snape are the same, they are going to look out for themselves they have no redeeming qualities I hope you share that opinion, nothing brings a story down like a reformed draco helping the order. anyway looking forward to the next update
     
    Last edited: Mar 3, 2007
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