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WIP Messing with Time by Nim-the-Lesser - M

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by Russano, Feb 10, 2015.

  1. Russano

    Russano Disappeared

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    Title: Messing with Time
    Author: Nim the Lesser
    Rating: M
    Genre: Adventure/Humor
    Status: WIP
    Library Category: The Alternates
    Pairings: None so far.
    Summary: Harry James Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Defeater of Voldemort, Chief Auror, Master of Death, finds that he is five years old. It should not surprise anyone that things in Magical Britain immediately become rather strange.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10714425/1/Messing-With-Time

    So in the spirit of the new rules I figured I'd throw this up here.

    This is a fairly standard time travel story with competent Head Auror Harry being thrown back in time to his 5 year old body.

    The story doesn't take itself overly seriously and has a tongue in cheek vibe throughout. Even though he is 5 at this point in the story, he is going around accomplishing things like breaking Sirius out, picking up horcruxes, and helping his friends - standard time travel fare, but it doesn't dwell or address them in annoying ways. As a result the pacing feels fairly quick and I was amused with the tone and the humor. Writing was readable if not fantastic (I'm a poor judge.)

    I like that even though its retreading familiar concepts that it isnt getting bogged down with the tedious waiting around that occurs in most time travel fics. Easy 4/5+ for me.

    At the very least its worth a guilty pleasure romp.
     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2015
  2. T3t

    T3t Purple Beast of DLP ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    This is actually one of the best new stories I've read in the last few months. It's very funny, surprisingly realistic, and you can already see serious conflict brewing.

    Easy 5/5, looking forward to more of this.
     
  3. Jeram

    Jeram Elder of Zion ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Agreed, great potential and near perfect characterizations. Harry is only slightly annoying.

    4/5
     
  4. NuScorpii

    NuScorpii Professor

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    I enjoyed it.

    4/5.
     
  5. Nauro

    Nauro Headmaster

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    One of the interesting things this fic did was paint a quick sketch of Ginny which I really liked. It was condensed well, and at the end of the chapter I liked the way her character was presented and was hoping to see more of her.

    (Then again, I always liked Ginny, so achieving this was easier than you might think - but it also matched what I wanted to see in the canon Ginny but never truly did.)

    Thus, it was disappointing that the narrative left Ginny behind as soon as the second chapter. Harry dwells on her for some time, but so far I've not seen any attempts to return back to the future, nor him trying to figure out what he is going to do with her younger self. You could argue that he's busy with all that is going on, but that's just not true - they are rather laid back and working their way through problems without any sort of rush.


    I liked the new way of combat this fic presents - with shields being superior to attacks. It is not in any way canon representation, but rather a new approach that makes just enough sense internally to get an approval out of me. This is one of the few fics that have a powerful Harry whip out a powerful shield, and not cast anything offensive through it, and it also has none of the indy!Harry dodging all the spells.


    Speaking about power... It's a powerfully built version of Harry, Master of Death, so it's understandable he gives everyone trouble, but he's not entirely careless, and he does have to retreat quite a few times.

    The better confrontations are at the Gregorovitch's, and the one with Moody. I liked the way banter went and overall everything about the set up.


    The bad - well, everyones an Animagus, but no phoenixes, just birds. A Lioness for ginny was a bit too much, but funny with the overall set up about Lilly and Ginny.
    I'd expect to hear something about Lilly being an animagus too.

    The true question is - is being funny a reason enough for most of the power increase and do we really need more upgrades to what already is there? I suppose the opinions might vary, and personally for me it was a drop too much, but not too much to ruin anything.

    Then - moving to live next to Hermione. I don't really see the point, and the appeal of that, but... There are a few funny scenes, and it doesn't take over the story, so I guess it's fine.


    Their plan of returning to Hogwarts. I'm mostly weary of this Harry repeating his school years, since it doesn't make much sense to. There are hints of steering Ron and Hermione during the future schooling - and I suspect Ginny, although that one wasn't stated outright.

    I don't believe the author will actually get to the school years, since there's a lot that can happen (and retelling the years would take a lot of time), so there's that, at least.

    So yeah, 3.5/5 - > 4/5.
     
  6. Stan

    Stan Order Member

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    It was decent. After reading Backwards with a Purpose and The Unforgiving Minute, redo fics rarely hold my attention anymore. This one seems to be a well written generic fix it fic, a slightly more serious version of Oh God Not Again. There are hints of a second time traveler in the latest chapter, so that could be interesting, especially if the time traveler is antagonistic (BWP has a friendly time traveler instead).

    I like the Sirius-Harry duo - its like A Black Comedy, only without the obnoxious immaturity. Ginny's characterization in the beginning was great (we really need some good post DH HG fics that focus on Harry's career as an auror) and the story is fast paced with decent action sequences. Still, Sirius is way too competent for someone who just escaped from prison. Harry getting along with 5-year old Hermione without getting bored out of his mind is quite unbelievable as well, and I don't really like the thought of Harry going to Hogwarts again and fixing everyone's problems (Neville's confidence issues, Luna's bullying etc). Overall, 3/5.
     
  7. Russano

    Russano Disappeared

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    I dont believe theres a second time traveler. Remember Sirius put on on the Diadem, then came back saying he didnt find it. He's probably just being possessed.
     
  8. Stan

    Stan Order Member

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    Is he really? How can Sirius be possessed if he isn't wearing the diadem? I figured the diadem tempted him and now he is hoarding it.

    Anyway, how does that explain the missing Ring? Someone must have removed it from the Shack.
     
  9. NuScorpii

    NuScorpii Professor

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    I think it's like the diary, only more powerful. Since he wore it once, it's formed a connection. It doesn't possess him all the time, but he also doesn't remember wearing it and taking it off. In later chapters he might start having gaps in memory.

    The ring is probably a coincidence, since it doesn't seem to be directly related. I don't think Dumbledore in Canon was aware of Horcruxes that early, but maybe he is in this fic, since he suspects Harry being possessed, which suggests that he might have some idea about them.
     
  10. pbluekan

    pbluekan Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    I read this a few weeks back and definitely enjoyed it as one of the best new fics I've read in recent months.

    I think the lack of Ginny in Harry's thoughts is possibly a 'Im sad and don't want to think about it thing' or just a mistake.

    As for who the second time traveler is: I think it's Ginny. They were in the same bed together when Harry 'disappeared.' And having a paranoid four year old with PTSD running around would fit the bill of this fic rather well.

    4.5/5
     
  11. ShotgunWilly

    ShotgunWilly First Year

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    It's not great IMO, but it's pretty good and it held my attention all the way through which isn't terribly easy so that counts for a lot. Plus, I'm a sucker for Peggy Sue fics in general.

    I'll go with 4/5.
     
  12. potterheadcharles

    potterheadcharles Third Year

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    Super interesting fic...for once someone is really applying sense and still keeping it funny. I very much like the characterisations, conversations and the reasoning the author gives behind everything. Harry's mind is like...wow.

    I enjoyed it greatly. So 5/5.

    On another note, I rather liked Ginny's description in the first chapter. Are there any stories with her like that? It's getting increasingly difficult to find non-Ginny romance stories nowadays. I am thinking of going back to her.
     
  13. gbbz

    gbbz Professor

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    I liked it overall, but the constant descriptions of various things from Harry's previous life broke the flow in many places for me. They were too long and too frequent. I found myself enjoying them more than the story itself at first but later started to skip them since they became annoying.

    High points for some original ideas and a fresh perspective on time-travelling Harry. But sometimes I think the author's tries to incorporate too much.
    (Animagus Falcon chick, the Delacours, the Grangers, who for some reason are now political Jewish immigrants from France [wtf?], Mad-Eye suddenly believing Harry for no reason etc.)

    3.5/5 for me
     
  14. thejabber27

    thejabber27 Groundskeeper

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    I like, I feel like there's not enough yet to be in the library but definitely has potential.

    4/5
     
  15. invinoveri

    invinoveri Third Year

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    Struggled to get past the first chapter. Ginny suffering from PTSD and is also a quidditch star. Hermione is the standard super witch. Wandless magic. Hitting my pet peeves.
     
  16. Reptile3607

    Reptile3607 Third Year

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    I liked it. With only eleven chapters, I'm not sure yet if its better or worse than oh god not again, but if that got in the library, then this should. A welcome break from my read-through of Harry Crow.

    4/5.
     
  17. Nerox

    Nerox High Inquisitor

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    Everyone and their gran is an Animagus. 2/5 at max.
     
  18. Alindrome

    Alindrome A bigger, darker mark DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    This was quite a fun little read! Nothing too serious, a little guilty pleasure Harry being skilled and powerful but it's never overdone and it's never overwhelming - overall the situations it allows them to get into are just fun. Harry hanging out with a slightly less demented Sirius and getting up to all sorts of mischief is really great to read.

    I've noticed the people who say they didn't like it too much are expecting something more serious - it's definitely a humour fic, through and through, and frankly that's perfect for me. Angsty time travel fics are a real bore.

    I'd give it a 4.3/5 if I could go for decimals. A good bit of fun, nothing mindblowing but well worth the read.
     
  19. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    First fic I've read in years I think. I enjoyed this one, not too serious, but amusing in all the right places. 4/5.
     
  20. Quills_and_Ink

    Quills_and_Ink Muggle

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    I really liked this fic as well! I think it's funny in a way that just appeals to a lot of people.
    It reads well and it is indeed in-character! Which is refreshing, considering the many different ways Harry is portrayed in fandom.

    Especially for a light, humour fic it's very good. Like the readers above said: nothing too serious, but enough to keep you readign. I rate it 4/5 stars.
     
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