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Structure of dialogue paragraphs

Discussion in 'Fanfic Discussion' started by Skeletaure, Apr 24, 2016.

  1. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Something I've been trying to do recently is diversify the structure of my dialogue paragraphs, as I've become increasingly dissatisfied with the repetition of dialogue structures.

    Here's the structures I mostly use.

    Long form

    Character beat. Speech begins, dialogue tag, character beat. Speech continues.

    Example:

    Slightly more complex example:

    Shorter forms

    Speech, tag, character beat.

    Character beat, speech.


    Those are pretty much all I use when it comes to dialogue structures. I'm especially keen to avoid the "speech, tag, beat" structure, because the repetition there becomes extremely noticeable due to the use of the gerund (ing form) for the beat.

    What dialogue structures do you use that you've found work well for you?
     
  2. chaosattractor

    chaosattractor Groundskeeper

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    I'm very interested in this small ten-inch penis. I'm quite sure it's completely relevant to the plot.

    On a more serious note, not all dialogue has to have a speech tag. In my last writing course we had assignments on communicating a character's voice without using tags, so you could practice that, I guess? That way you can separate the dialogue from the action, allowing you to employ verb forms other than the gerund. Generally I use tags and beats less and less the longer the conversation continues, when the reader has had time to settle into the flow of their voices.

    (Wait, why does my phone recognize gesundheit as a word but not gerund?)

    We also did the whole write-a-story-using-only-dialogue thing, so you could also try putting some of the information you communicate via beats in Harry or other characters' speech. Especially when said information is some sort of emotional reaction; getting emotions across through direct speech is challenging but rewarding. Or so my professor tells me.

    So, in a completely nonsensical and slightly horrific example:

    Aaaaaaaand forget I ever wrote that.
     
  3. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    chaosattractor - Have you got any fanfics sitting around? Curious to read one now, if you do. Good thoughts.
     
  4. Hawkin

    Hawkin Chief Warlock

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    My first instinct is to go :

    This thread actually made me realized that I needed to work on my dialogue a bit more and I think it improved my most recent attempt at writing. So thank you for that!
     
  5. Joe's Nemesis

    Joe's Nemesis High Score: 2,058 ~ Prestige ~

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    To tag (No pun intended) on to what @chaosattractor said, I remember reading somewhere to not go over 4 lines without a beat or tag so you're not losing the reader on who's saying what.

    So, with that, I'll sometimes begin the conversation, and then add the beat.

    Snape barreled through the door, out of breath and frightened.

    "Stop!"

    "Why?" Harry continued writing in his memoirs on Snape's fascination with size. "Afraid the truth'll get out?"

    "dialogue"

    "dialogue"

    "dialogue"

    "dialogue"

    Snape reached for the scrolls, but Harry was too fast. "dialogue"

    "dialogue"

    "Question," Tag

    "dialogue."

    Harry gathered the scrolls and locked them away. "I was raised a Muggle, so I know how to use a ruler."

    Don't know if that helps, hurts, or is just crap.

    But, the one thing I've found best helps my dialogue is putting it down for a few days and then coming back and reading it again, then removing whatever doesn't feel natural, regardless of technicality.
     
  6. Steelbadger

    Steelbadger Death Eater

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    I am very aware that I overuse the Speech, tag, beat. More speech form in my writing. It varies a little by the story I'm writing (with more 'spontaneous' stories generally having somewhat more flowing dialogue) but that still probably describes easily more than 50% of all my written speech:

    Another form I use a lot is Beat. Speech, tag, more speech.:

    One thing I dislike is starting a paragraph with a beat. This is mostly because the easiest beat to come up with begins with the character's name. It can lead to a terrible form:

    Snape, Harry, Snape, Harry. It just feels so boring, no matter what else you do with the paragraphs.

    I also feel that just plain speech, no tags or beats, should be used for fast-paced dialogue, or to lend a single line some kind of impact.

    It's a bit of a case of damned-if-you-do and damned-if-you-don't really. I have these rules for what 'looks good' or 'reads well', but which also locks me in to a fairly small sub section of the possibilities. I am loath to go too far off the beaten track in search of interesting dialogue formats because I feel like that is completely besides the point of writing. It's not supposed to impress with flashy use of punctuation of sentence structure; it's merely meant to paint a picture in the mind of the reader. Simple is often a good way of doing that. More complex options should be used only sparingly, so that their impact isn't diminished.

    But what's just me.
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2016
  7. Erotic Adventures of S

    Erotic Adventures of S Denarii Host

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    So this is how Slash enters DLP... academic debate... This is why people hate Liberals.
     
  8. Eilyfe

    Eilyfe Supreme Mugwump

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    When varying tags or leaving them out entirely, the difficult part, to me, is to decide how well can I expect the reader to have followed the flow of the conversation. In a perfect world the voice of every character is so distinct that no tags are needed. Since that seems utopic, varying not just the length of the tags but also of the speech itself is also a preferred tool to evoke a certain impression.

    What helps is that the beat doesn’t always have to consist of physical action. Thoughts or descriptions are fine too. What follows is just some silliness I wrote to demonstrate how I usually structure my dialog.

    Now that I think of it, I also like to spruce things up with constructions such as this:

    Obviously the last one doesn't always work, but it's a nice change if used sparingly.

    Rarely I also start with Tag + Speech, as in: He said, "I don't think that's a good idea." (Which can be extended, of course, into: He said, "I don't think that's a good idea," and was surprised to see that his concerns were overruled.)

    There are quite a lot of ways to vary dialog, but for me that happens mostly in the editing stage when I also read out loud. Easier to catch rough patches that way.
     
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