Back on topic.

This fic updated again. As I ease off the euphoria of being introduced to Naruto fanfiction, this is one of the few Naruto stories I really like seeing updated.

This chapter had an excellent mix of ninja related content (the training of Naruto's team and the mission itself) and character development (Anko digging in to Naruto's past). Keep up the good work and looking forward to future installments.

 

How about giving Naruto Sage Mode, which is quite literally the most powerful "buff" in the entire manga, and then backpedaling by trying to say that it's not as powerful in the story as it is in the manga.

What the hell is the point, then? Why not come up with something other than Sage Mode to give the main character instead of giving him a bastardized version of a great power? It's akin to an author giving a character a Sharingan but making it so that it can only use half of its abilities. If you don't like the canon Sharingan, then come up with something that isn't the Sharingan.

It's not that difficult.

 

Nothing that retarded, just a different summons.

Kyubbi No Kitsune is a fox in appearance, right? And there have been Slug summons, Frog summons, and Snake Summons, right? why not a Fox/kitsune summon, that see's the Kyubbi and it's holder as their leader/lord. comments?

 

I think Madara can summon the Kyubbi, though it might be fanon.

 

What I'm talking about isn't adding new ideas to the Naruto universe. It's taking existing, explained notions from the manga and twisting them around to suit an author's needs. A fox contract isn't out of line in my opinion, just so long as you distinguish the foxes in the contract (which should be actual foxes, just like the toads are actual toads) from the bijuu Kyuubi (who is a massive manifestation of chakra and not an actual fox).

Though I do have to say that I've read one too many fox!contract stories in my time to actually like the idea.

It was said in the manga that Madara could "summon" it and control it, but what that actually means and to what extent he could exert his control is still rather mysterious.

 

I thought up the idea when one of the people of A Demons Desire said Kitsune were tricksters and the like. Made me wonder about it. Shit like giving Naruto 40 bloodlines isn't my favorite thing to read. What about actual Kitsune though? not a summons or any shit like that. but the Kyubbi is called Kyubbi No Kitsune. must count for something.

Damn, not an original idea then?

 

Well in Japanese mythology kitsune aren't actual foxes - they're more supernatural beings like fairies and the like. The Kyuubi as it's written in the manga isn't a fox or a kitsune, however. It's just a mass of malevolent chakra, which is why it could be sealed into Naruto in the first place.

And no, the fox contract isn't particularly original.

 

Just think of the Kyuubi as a mass of evil surrounded by the image of a fox. It's a much better representation than an actual kitsune.

 

This last chapter was very good with addressing my earlier criticisms. The conversation with Jiraiya felt natural and not forced (like an author's device). I felt some aspects of his character in earlier chapters had a canned quality to them, but this reads very well.

The battle could use a better write. The sequence of events makes sense but it isn't too engaging (I feel fatigued trying to read through it), though I do like how you took advantage of three dimensions with water. I think it's a language issue.

"Right fowl bitch" probably should be "foul"?

"Fortunately, it has done so several feet to his right" has spontaneous present tense change.

So why is your fic called Tuebor?

 

Some grammatical and spelling errors fixed - be sure to mention them if you see more.

Tuebor is latin for "I Will Protect", as for why my story's called that? Well, I believe it's from Naruto's stubborn desire to protect those who can't protect themselves despite being in a situation where he has no real motivation for doing so.

 

Thought you were from Michigan or something.

 

Not quite . . .

 

You do know that she looks like a Female Sasuke right? I don't find her particularly attractive...

 

You do know that Sasuke already looks like a female, right?

 

Does this look female to you?




​

 

He look fat to me. XD

 

His posture is fairly manly. Give him tits and make him giggle and you got yourself a girl. Congratz.

 

'He' has the same body type as Rukia - dunno what that means . . . lol.

 

Thin ankles, large hips, facial structure is thin and pointed... Yeah, actually, he does.

Just read through this fic a few days ago and I'm enjoying it mightily. A bit surprised that Sasuke hasn't said anything more on the subject of Naruto being Itachi's teammate, but I suppose they've been busy with other things. Veeeeery curious what's up with the pills, maybe something to shut the furball up (DID)?

5/5

 

"ores" should be "oars"