1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

Abandoned [Unchained] by [lucifael75] - [NC-17]

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by dragon_89, May 28, 2008.

  1. NightFox

    NightFox Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2007
    Messages:
    206
    Location:
    New York
    Not a bad smut fic, with decent writing style and dialogue. Basically, if you can dream a heterosexual pairing, this Harry's on his way to get it done. I'm counting Patil, Brown, Greengrass, Davis, Tonks, Delacour, Bones(Soon, methinks), possible Lovegood, Granger, Weasley, Black x2.

    It's a guilty pleasure, one that is sadly followed by "Marriage Contracts," if not purely for the Daphne-factor. Cliches have to be ignored, including Harry becoming this super-man whose abilities range to pleasuring women with the barest of contacts, and the attraction of just about every woman to him, to flicking people around as if they're mere ants.

    There are some laughable moments, however. It's not a bad fic for light-hearted ignorance but nothing in favor of a serious, darker read.
     
  2. Warlocke

    Warlocke Fourth Champion

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2006
    Messages:
    3,051
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The armpit of Ohio
    Frankly, some of the critics here should be pleased at the fact that not everyone in this fic is a sex god/goddess. I think it's hilarious how Cho utterly fails at sex and her idea of pillow talk is horrific.

    Pretty much the only thing she got right is showing up with a pair of breasts and a vagina. When your partner spends the entire time either laughing at you or wincing in pain, 'You're Doing It Wrong'.
     
  3. scaryisntit

    scaryisntit Death Eater

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2008
    Messages:
    926
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    I'm with Sesc about the Lavender thing. That came from nowhere, but I don't have as much of a problem as he did.

    Unfortunately, now it seems to be incorporating every possible harem cliche, and a number of others.

    Yet I'm still reading...

    For that, I'm giving it a 2.5/5. It isn't something I'd read again, that's for sure. There are so many cringe worthy moments in this fic that it is not funny, but I still want to read on. Points for that.
     
    Last edited: May 30, 2008
  4. yhelo

    yhelo Sixth Year

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2007
    Messages:
    172
    Location:
    Texas...the land of y'all
    I'm really liking this story. I did skip over a lot of the first chapter, though. I like the happy Harry idea, but I dislike how it mentions he used to be different every two minutes causing the author to further emphasize the point that Harry is different.

    We know already, damn.

    I give it a 4/5 for the lulz it gave me.
     
  5. Snarf

    Snarf Squanchin' Party Bro! ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2007
    Messages:
    18
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Forty-Six & 2
    High Score:
    1,832
    Whenever I read stories like these, my first thought is 'guilty pleasure' and that's alright with me. The thing is, guilty pleasure fics shouldn't be promoted fics, if that makes any sense. I read these when I know most here at DLP won't, so why would we ever try and put it in the Library? Maybe make a Guilty Pleasures Thread and add in all of those cliche'd stories that most here can't stand, but most definitely don't try to put this in the Library. I'm giving it a 1/5 just to cut down on the star rating more.
     
  6. knothead

    knothead Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2007
    Messages:
    362
    Maybe because a library with guilty pleasures is a library that's used more often? Having worked in a public library, I can say that a lot of the fiction that was checked out would be considered guilty pleasures.

    There's already an Almost Recommended thread that would work perfectly for these cases.
     
    Last edited: May 31, 2008
  7. Tehan

    Tehan Avatar of Khorne DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    May 22, 2007
    Messages:
    3,742
    Not really, the Almost Recommended thread is for when you're desperate enough for something to read that you'll take something substandard. A thread dedicated to 'guilty pleasure' fics - shallow as hell but just as fun - now that would fill another niche entirely.
     
  8. OdinMage

    OdinMage Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2006
    Messages:
    111
    I will admit to loving Siege's (the author's older nick) work, but until this story I had only read his Xander-centric Buffyverse fanfic. I agree with others, that it's always uber-powerful, harem having male lead, but I like that.... the writing might not be the most clean, but the stories are good, and cliches can be over looked, especially considering the fact that, as far as I know, he doesn't really read HP fanfic, so an idea he's never seen isn't cliche to him...

    I'll give this a 4/5 because I love Siege, but I admit the writing could be better.
     
  9. King Dimension

    King Dimension First Year

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2007
    Messages:
    28
    Location:
    USA
    I really like this and have been following this at his yahoo group (there at ch15); its 'fucking' with 'story' [even if its a story with super-powerful and harem Harry--but that's what's fun about it, so whatever.] You don't see too many of these at ficwad. Guilty pleasure indeed.
     
  10. Vesvius

    Vesvius High Inquisitor DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2007
    Messages:
    567
    So, how does one join this Yahoo group? Whenever I try to load any part of it, it just says that the group is for members only, with no option to join.
     
  11. Korisovra

    Korisovra Headmaster

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2008
    Messages:
    1,163
    Location:
    At your mothers house
    You have to e-mail the author to join.
     
  12. Vesvius

    Vesvius High Inquisitor DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2007
    Messages:
    567
    Ah. Thanks much.
     
  13. Veri

    Veri Denarii Host

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2007
    Messages:
    350
    Location:
    The only state that doesn't suck.
    I must retract my earlier rating, as I have come to actually enjoy this story, despite the fact that I really wish I didn't. The smut is surprisingly well written, considering the average quality of fan-fiction sex, and it fits well with the tone of the story.

    It's an enjoyable read, not much actual substance (although the author is obviously trying) and the few problems don't really bother me all that much, at least not enough to stop reading it.

    As a fairly well written, enjoyable read, I hereby rate it 4/5.
     
  14. thapagan

    thapagan High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2006
    Messages:
    577
    I kinda like the story. The cho scene was like a car crash, horrible, but you just have to stare. The Lavender thing has me wondering "what is going on".
    I like the "I am not going to marry you" thing, Or is it the young man sowing wild oats thing? 3/5 Keep it in the bin.
     
  15. Korisovra

    Korisovra Headmaster

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2008
    Messages:
    1,163
    Location:
    At your mothers house
    Erm.....Dragon's have harems. As for Lavender, her addiction was cut off and now she's being a bitch. The Cho scene was....hilarious as hell, best sex scene EVAR!
     
  16. Darius

    Darius 13/m/box

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2006
    Messages:
    2,582
    Location:
    The Octagon - Say that to my face and not online m
    If this wasn't a Harem and just Harry hooking up with as many girls as possible it would be 5/5. As it is I can't in good conscience give this 5/5 but I will give it 4/5.
     
  17. thisperson

    thisperson Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2006
    Messages:
    710
    This is indeed a guilty pleasure fic.

    4/5
     
  18. Korisovra

    Korisovra Headmaster

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2008
    Messages:
    1,163
    Location:
    At your mothers house
  19. shadetz x

    shadetz x Second Year

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2007
    Messages:
    66
    Location:
    Vancouver the other side of Surrey
    It was a decent read but that was about it. The story did not have the WOW quality to it that the better stories have. The author introduced conflicts but were easily resolved as Harry was so super-powered. The plot seemed to focus on Harry getting more girls to add to his collection. I give this a 3.5/5.
     
  20. scaryisntit

    scaryisntit Death Eater

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2008
    Messages:
    926
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    The most recent chapter was pretty poor, in my opinion. This, though, is mainly because I detest Bellatrix in this situation. The author has taken the simple, cliche route and made Bella perfect by saying she was forced. The sex was epic in the sense that it was perfect for both of them, and subsequently completely unrealistic. I forced myself through it all, but didn't enjoy it as I did any of the others. Here's hoping Bella takes a back seat for the rest of the story.